Monsters in the Woods (2012)

Micro-budget, half-baked monster twaddle RELEASED IN 2012 and written/directed by Jason Horton, "Monsters in the Woods" is a micro-budget flick (costing a mere $30,000) about – you guessed it – monsters in the woods of Southern California that an indie film crew experience while shooting a B-horror flick. I like the diverse ethnic cast, which is refreshing, but the shaky, sometimes unfocused, cam gets tedious after a while. There are a few good-looking women. I also like the monsters, which are half-spider/half-human and impressively diabolic all things considered (it’s eventually explained WHY they’re so diabolic-looking). The first act is quite amusing as it parodies the trials & tribulations of a B-horror shoot in the sticks. Near the end of the first act, however, one of the main protagonists abruptly buys the farm and the reaction of the cast & crew is unconvincing but, then, I guess it’s supposed to be a joke anyway. The second act introduces two curious characters with head-scratching dialogue but, thankfully, the cool monsters are also introduced. Unfortunately, the proceedings and characters are dull and confusing as written and executed. Things finally perk up in the last act with revelations about what's really going on, but it can't save the flick from being what it is: half-baked. There's enough good here for a quality monster-in-the-woods horror movie, but Jason Horton needed to take the time to work the kinks out in the story/script, specifically in the second and final acts. George Romero did this with his original "Night of the Living Dead" (1968) and it remains a selling masterpiece to this day. The lesson? Don't rush off into the woods to shoot a horror flick with cast & crew, low-budget or not, UNTIL you have a well-written, comprehensible story with interesting characters. Otherwise you're just wasting your time and the time of anyone who might view your work. THE MOVIE RUNS 84 minutes and was shot in Fawnskin, San Bernardino National Forest (exteriors) and Malibu, California. GRADE: C-/D+